Marriage can be a very complicated adventure. One of the main reasons that women find marriage so frustrating at times is not knowing how their husbands truly feel about them. Of course you want to believe that your husband values you over everything else in his life, with the exception of your children. But how do you really know if your husband values you? There are actually many aspects involved in this question. You may be wondering if he truly values your opinion as an equal, or if he appreciates the things that you do for him and your family. Not knowing how your husband really feels can leave you more than frustrated and has been the basis for many marital problems over the years.
First you should understand that if you really do not know how your husband feels about you and your relationship then that could signal a gap in communication. Having good communication between the two of you is one of the most important concepts in a happy and successful marriage.
That being said let’s delve into learning how you can better understand your importance to your spouse. Remember the old saying that the best marriages begin with the best friendships? This concept still holds true. If your husband is your friend then you have the basis for a much stronger marriage. If your husband is your friend then you should have no problems communicating with him. If you are truly in doubt about how he feels then simply talk to him. Open up communication and let him know how you feel. Best friends are our most important assets in life. If your husband is also your best friend then he will talk to you, laugh with you, support you, encourage you and perhaps most important, respect you.
Of course you need to understand that respect is a two-way street. In order to get respect we must give it. If you do not respect your husband or value him then you simply can not expect him to give these things to you. If you notice that your husband is frequently putting your needs and feelings before yours, this is a good indication of respect. If you see him constantly doing small things that he knows will please you, this is another indication. These small things don’t necessarily have to have a grand meaning. They could be as simply as washing the dishes when he knows that you are not feeling well or bringing you a good morning cup of coffee. If you notice that he does these things on at least a semi-regular basis then you probably have nothing to worry about in the value department.
Another good indication of how much your husband values you is in the way that he handles your arguments. Many things can be said in the heat of an argument that we don’t really mean. The key is in how these things are said as well as how bad these things actually are. If you are truly respected by your husband then he will never use name-calling or demeaning comments even in the most intense argument. There will be no threats of divorce or telling you that you can leave if you do not agree with him. The goal of your argument should be to work things out and get on with your lives. If he truly respects you then he will know that an argument is just that - a disagreement and he will strive to do everything possible to find a solution to the argument that makes you both happy.